Kayla Moran
Founder of Kayla Moran Law

If you type “success” into a Google search bar, many suggestions will come up. Quotes, definitions, success for women, success for men, success memes—overall, a ton of qualifiers and articles about different research  into what success looks like and stories of all kinds of people who have achieved it.

But what is success, really? If you are reading this you are probably very familiar with the old lawyer adage, “It depends,” and in this case, it really does depend. On you. On your goals, your ambitions, what you are passionate about, what drives you, how you want to show up in the world and more.

It is similar to choosing a law school, in a way, or deciding between job offers, if we are lucky enough to have multiple employment opportunities. I often coach law students to choose a law school based on the programs offered by the schools that interest them and to consider how those opportunities may lead to the types of careers and lifestyles they want. This holistic approach is how we should model our personal definitions of success. This is because when we base success on our goals and objectives in life, we are more likely to feel fulfilled.

To some, success means making six-figure or seven-figure salaries with a vacation home somewhere and a fancy car in the expensive driveaway. To others, it means a long, healthy life, with travel and fewer material possessions. To another group, it is the freedom to work or not work whenever they want, from wherever in the world, or even where they decide to spend some time that month. Some choose to have families with children, and others choose to adopt rescue animals and spoil them rotten. Success has different paths, and it is up to us to select the paths that make the most sense for us.

Yet, if you log into social media, it is going to feel like you must pick the first option—the version of success that is measured by financial wealth and material possessions. And for some, that is a great option. But you might want to step back and consider the things you would likely have to sacrifice to have that version of success …. Is that still the right choice for you?

Instagram is a highlight reel. We are so easily influenced these days by people sharing their every waking moment, it can be difficult to discern our own thoughts, needs, and wants  from those that we are consuming. We forget we do not see the whole story—but instead, just what the creator/author wants us to see. We have no idea if they are happy or living off credit cards to make it seem like they are living a grander life than they are living or can afford.

The same may be true for people we often see in the community, at events, or at our favorite restaurants. We rarely see the whole picture. Life’s satisfaction may not be visually apparent.

Yet, we use pictures and media to envision our future life. Vision boards are a great resource, but vision boards without a list of goals and intentions for your life are meaningless. Success requires dreaming.  Success is the journey of becoming the most whole person you can envision in your heart and mind.

So, my question for you is: what fulfills you?

Does professional success mean having the time, freedom, and flexibility to work on the projects you enjoy—but going solo, at least for a while, in private practice by yourself, with no benefits? Or does it mean having a stable job working for someone else that provides a great life on paper and a 401(k)-retirement plan, even if you dread showing up to work every day and cannot wait to leave the office every night?

Both notions of a professional path are hard in their own way; both have pros and cons. It is about choosing the hard path that is more fulfilling to you. This is the metric we should use to evaluate success: checking in with our core sense of life’s meaning and progressing along the path that allows us to experience it.

If you get to go to bed most nights of the week grateful, optimistic about the future, and excited for the opportunities coming your way, if you enjoy the people who surround you, if you have hobbies you look forward to, and if you are happy to go home every night to the same four walls and bed, that’s fulfillment. That’s success.

The fancy houses and condos, the luxury watches and cars, and the Michelin star dinners are all a bonus. Success may include enjoying these things, but merely experiencing them does not, and probably will not, fulfill you. Material things are a way to pass the time, and they can be fun. But maybe you are more of a nature person, anyway. It is important to avoid adopting someone else’s success metrics as your own without evaluating your own purpose for being.

If we don’t stop to adjust our views of success every once in a while, and take time to appreciate the definition of success on which we are basing our day-to-day activities, we might wake up one day and realize that we are not fulfilled or happy. We may even panic, thinking it is too late to experience true personal success.

It is never too late. But to avoid that panic, let’s make a conscious effort to reevaluate our priorities this month and redefine success. And if you find yourself reevaluating more than once, embrace the task. With time and experience, we evolve, and success may be a moving goal post—or not a goal post at all, but instead something much less concrete.

For me, I would like a little of both: the softer, more flexible life and the finer things. But the key is that I get to choose where my time, skills, and money go. As a result, legal entrepreneurship made sense for me. But maybe the stability of a corporate firm job makes more sense for you, and there is nothing wrong with that. Just make sure you get to make a choice and keep making that choice , so you are never left feeling like your work is not worth the time you are spending on it.

Pursuing a focused, individualized version of success can also have collateral benefits.  If you remain aware of your circumstances and continue to pursue success on your own terms, you are likely to attract the right kind of people aligned with your definition of success along the way! Sharing your purposeful, personalized success journey with others can be part of the joy that success brings, too, and if you feel so called, please join me in the creative process of achieving personal fulfillment in your work and the rest of your life.